DINNAE FESHIE YERSEL'

The August walk was near Feshiebridge and was attended by a small, but select group. At least, that is what they told me. I was not on the walk and nor were Pam and Hugh. We were all watching the mighty Caley Thistle thrash Celtic 2 - 2. The Pollocks were in Canada, the Smiths were entertaining friends and the Donaldsons were decorating, although Charlie probably wasn't up any ladders.. 

As I wasn't there, I have had to rely on Sharon's photography skills and my own imagination to relate the tale of the walk. This means that it may not be a factual record of what happened, but I am pretty sure that it will be close to the truth.

Anyway, here is the start of the walk and Sandra is faced with the first problem of the day. They actually want money for us to park in the countryside. Sandra seldom does anything so vulgar as carry cash, but once she told the machine who she was, she got her ticket.

Here is the proof. Doesn't she look delighted.

Next up, Janet. She had been clever and watched Sandra, so she knew what to do and she acquired a ticket without delay.

Meanwhile Dave has found some old shoes lying about the car park and he immediately set about trying them on like Cinderella. Happily they fitted, but Maureen declined to kiss the handsome prince, preferring to speak to Mac about the international situation, or indeed, anything else.

They had parked at the Forest Sculpture trail.

There was a list of the sculptural pieces...

 ...but, being Philistines, they ignored the cultural highlights and went on the walk in the woods. If only I had been there to encourage them to open their eyes, minds and hearts to something more cerebral.

They saw a big tree - well what did they expect?

They saw a bridge too. It was shaping up to be a memorable walk.

Apparently this was a bridge photo and these little people on the bridge were, from the left, Maureen, Sandra, Mac, Janet and Dave. Sharon seems to have failed to find the zoom button on the camera. There is a bit more evidence of this failure later on.

Just in case they hadn't recognised that they were standing on the bridge over the River Feshie, the Council had put up a helpful sign for them.

They clearly liked the bridge and looked over the edge a lot.

This is what they saw.

The raging torrent of the Feshie had managed to cut some delicate shapes and bowls into the rock. It just goes to show that there can be beauty in strength and savagery. I expect if I had been there I would have launched into some elegiac and poetic speech, but I wasn't, so I won't. However, the framing of the photos with the leaves lend the picture a lyrical quality that reminds me of a book I once read called the Dark Twin. It is a strange tale about confused love. Suffice to say that the boy gets the girl, but too late to avoid their tragic fate. All is not lost because they will live again, over and over, until they manage to reconcile their destinies and meet at the pond at the end of the world - which this could be.

See, I said I wouldn't get all romantic and slushy didn't I? 

Dave meets a dog.

Although, Hugh and Pam were not on the walk, there did seem to be some degree of uncertainty over which route to take.

A mushroom. The photo is not close enough for me to be certain of the type and so I cannot go on at length and bore you to tears about it. 

Well I could describe what mushrooms are and how they form, but you'll be glad to know that I am a bit short of time, so I won't.

 Dave helps Sandra across the raging torrent.

Then he helps Maureen.

He left Mac to get on with it.

 Soon they came to the River Feshie again, but further up towards the source.

They could see significant gravel beds in front of them. Had I been there I could have gone on at some length about the River, It is remarkably flashy. In fact, the flashy Feshie is one of the most active rivers in the country.

It is hugely important for fluvial and Holocene geomorphology and is intensively studied and is heavily protected by Nature Conservation designations.

Holocene means recent geological time. Basically the period since the last ice age. The Feshie is so active in geomorphological terms that it allows people to study how rivers have changed since the ice age and how they are still changing, so it is very important. No doubt they noted all this while they were there. I may ask questions on the next walk.

You think this is a quite pleasing photo of the clouds. Well it is, but there is a glider and a tow plane below the centre of the picture just on the edge of the lozenge of blue sky. Honest. 

Here they are in an other picture.

They are actually in this photo as well, but I think the clouds are more interesting.

Should I go into some detail about about cloud formations?

Sharon says NO NO NO NO!

Clouds and gravel fans - I could go on - in fact it would allow me to describe the whole of the water cycle. Perhaps not.

 I was told these were blonde cows. Not like any I have seen down the town on a Saturday night.

 Active erosion - need I say any more?

What glider?

No it is there, you just won't see it in the photo, because I can't work the zoom lens properly.

Oh never mind, lets have a sweetie.

 Where was the glider, again?

Look there they are - as plain as day.

She may not have got a good close up of the glider, but she did manage to get the mad pilot.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it Batman?

No it is a squirrel - well not a real one.

I seem to remember a musical about a squirrel on the roof. 

If I were a rodent. Du ba du ba du ba doo.

That was singing, not 'owling.

 Another dog. This one seems to be investigating the potential of Mac's seat as a urinal.

Lots of Rowan berries on the trees everywhere. Surely we are in for a hard winter.

Well you might think so and perhaps we are, but lots of berries are no guarantee of that.

In fact, there is no real evidence to suggest that the berries are predicting a hard winter. In fact, it is most likely that the berries are a reaction in the trees to a late, cold spring followed by better weather that delayed flowering and then allowed the trees to take advantage by producing more flowers (and so berries) without being affected by late frosts. So berries tend to illustrate what has gone, not what is to come.

The next stage of the walk takes the hardy group to the Uath Lochans.

I am not so sure that they would be quite so hardy if they knew what Uath means in English.

It actually has a number of meanings, but one of these would be dread or terror. It can also mean solitary, lonesome or alone.

Certainly the Lochans are a little bit out of the way and it may be that this would translate as lonesome. However, the most likely meaning relates to the Gaelic alphabet. All letters in the Gaelic alphabet are named after trees. Uath is the eighth letter of the alphabet and it is named for the Hawthorn tree. I am not sure if the group saw any Hawthorns, or if they would have recognised them if they did as they walked round the lochans of the hawthorns.

Luckily there were picnic benches at the Uath Lochans car park, so they stopped for lunch. I wonder if anyone had the apposite snack of bread and cheese, because this is the name given to new hawthorn leaves in the spring.

I know Sharon didn't because I had lovingly prepared her a tuna pasta salad before she left for the walk.

Neither did Sandra have bread and cheese as she had walked around with an empty back pack. Apparently this was not a mistake, but merely an exercise in vanity as she did not want to seem unburdened when everyone else was laden down. Apparently Sherpa Dave carried all her requirements.

Another dog  - this one looks confused by the endless choice of trees.

Janet, on the other hand, felled this mighty denizen of the forest with one blow from her hand. You wouldn't want to argue with that.

Clearly the blow was sharp and fast as she has cut the tree cleanly but there is a bit of charring from the sheer speed of the blow.

One of the Uath Lochans, and not a hawthorn in sight.

Down to the bird hide.

Nae birds.

No, none there either.

This panel explains how the Lochans were formed by the retreating glacier some 16000 years ago, before even Dave was born. The chunk of ice left behind was covered in sand and gravel and when the ice melted the depression left behind filled with water. These types of lochs are known as kettleholes. The kettlehole gradually filled with peat and vegetation and the loch divided up into the 4 lochans we see today. 

Just wrote that all out in case you weren't on the walk or you were on the walk and were not paying attention.

Sandra wanders out over the peatlands laden down with the guilty secret of her empty back pack.

Still nae birds.

Still nae hawthorns.

But there was a ruin - I wonder if it was Hawthorn Cottage.

Dave poses in the window of the ruin in a way that is reminiscent of the artwork for the brilliant Led Zeppelin IV 

This has gone to Dave's head and here he is in a classic clothes catalogue pose.

Apparently there is a caterpillar in this photo.

I blew the image up, so that you could actually see it. 

Even then, I could not identify it.

It looks like his big brother is hiding in the trees.

Soon they were out of he woods and into the Potting Shed tea shop, where a wide range of beverages and cakes was on offer and they took full advantage.

Even Dave had a cake, but that might have been because Sandra refused to halve hers with him.

They even got to watch a woodpecker while they pecked at their cakes.

It wasn't just any old tea shop, but one of the top 10 cake shops in the country.

Thanks are due to Dave and Sandra for organising everything - it really looks like they had a good time. Thanks to Sharon for taking the photos and also to Janet for providing me with the photo of the mad pilot.

Finally, the most effusive thanks go to Caley Thistle for making the day for myself and Pam and Hugh.