A WALK IN THE FORRES

Due to suffering from jetlag, Sharon and I couldn't wake up in time to go on the May walk in and around Forres. Consequently, this blog is made up and may bear no relationship at all to the true events of the day, which goes against my sense of fair reporting of the fact, but hey ho.

Here they all are in Forres getting ready to go.

 

Janet and Sandra are overcome with emotion. So much so that Sandra has thrown off her glove in a moment of madness.

 

Dave, meanwhile is tempted to join in and referee the wee boys plating footie in the park. Once a PE teacher, always a PE teacher.

 

Ever the statistician (that's quite dificalt to type quickly and acuritely), Mac records the exact time of the first steps on the walk. For no other reason than he could.

 

 

Despite the millions spent on flood alleviation in Forres, the half pipe at the local skateboard park is awash.

 

 

A slightly lop-sided bridge photo. At least they all seem to be looking at the camera. I find it hard to believe that Jimmy has some sort of animal magnetism that makes people look at him more than me, so it must have been luck.

 

Even the swans in Forres like to live on the edge.

 

 

You can tell I didn't take the photos. Here is a picture of a building. It most likely has some fine architectural features, which have been artfully obscured by the fence.

 

Clearly, I am missing the significance of the fence, as here are Mac, Janet and Dave admiring the said fence. Of these  three, I would have thought only Janet had at least a smattering of aesthetic sensibility.

 

 

This, I think, is the same building, but from a different angle, which has allowed the viewer to see what it is like without the fence obscuring the detail. Well it would allow that, but for the cars and the greenery. Perhaps the next photo will be more revealing.

 

Well, no it isn't. It is, in fact one of the most common views on all Dinosaur walks - people looking in different directions and giving a good impression of not knowing exactly where they were. These photos almost always involve Hugh, but not this time.

Quite often in these situations there is someone who doesn't realise a photo is being taken and they do something that looks strange, rude or stupid. In this case, Dave. I did think of leaving it there, but he does look like he is opening a nice bottle of claret.

 

 

After a quick swig he is striding out like a good 'un. Robin, on the other hand is striding out like John Cleese.

Looks like a nice spot for lunch.

 

However, they carry on regardless.

 

Pam's favourite kind of cows - the ones behind a fence.

 

 

And here she is checking the strength of the fenceposts. Just in case.

 

Next up, one of my favourite types of building - a distillery. However, this one is, in fact one of my least favourite buildings - a distillery that has closed down.

 

I am not sure why this photo was sent to me for inclusion in the blog. However, Jacque and Jimmy took the photos. They own a caravan. There is a caravan in the photo.

It's the best I can come up with.

 

Allegedly there are squirrels about. At least, I think it is meant to be a squirrel. Perhaps the artist had been at the Dallas Dhu.

 

A sign to help the walker. This was especially designed for the Dinosaurs, which you can tell because the wee walker is going in the opposite direction to the arrow.

 

And here is the male model for the wee walker on the sign.

 

For some strange reason, this photo reminded me of the mass migration of lemmings - nothing stops them or gets in their way. They have no regard for health and safety. And there is always one lagging behind at the back, blissfully unaware of impending doom. Janet!

 

But they made it across the road and managed to find somewhere for lunch. Even Janet made it through. David Attenborough would have been impressed by such a stirring tale of survival against the odds to make it to the feeding grounds.

 

The lunchtime cabaret involved a short 1960's style performance from Dave Dino and his backing group the Dinorettes.

 

 

I assume this is a photo of a very lucky person's fence. Not if he heard the singing of Dave and the Dinorettes he wasn't!

 

A photo taken by one of the founder members of the flat earth society.

Of gorse it is.

 

Janet, Maureen and Susan make it through a forest of pricks....

 

...and out the other side to the river.

 

 

The next two photos are very strange. The first shows the roof of a tent in what appears to be the middle of nowhere.

Here is the tent. In a clearing. In the middle of nowhere.

 

 

But the next photo contains no clue as to why the tent was there. Did nobody sneak a look inside? Was there no sign as to who, what, where, when, why? I really want to know and now probably never will.

Wanderers? Outcasts? Boy Scouts? Girl Guides? Both? Wee boys out for the weekend? Tourists?

The speculation in my mind is in tents.

 

Instead we end up on the A96.

Why?

 

A photo of most of the bridge plaque.

 

The view from the bridge, possibly taken from near the plaque.

 

 

The view from below the bridge. The photographer did not make the group stay on the bridge for a photo.

Down by the riverside.

Once again, the world slips off to the left, presumably in a protest against continued austerity.

 

No doubt due to the tilt in the earth, the Dinosaurs all find themselves tottering to the one side.

 

 

A bridge photo. Well a photo of a bridge. There may be people behind the bars and some would say that is where they should stay.

 

Another bridge photo, but this time you can see the people on the bridge.

 

Heading back towards the cars and a cup of tea.

 



Finally, here they are - shadowy figures in the trees watching a strange arcane game involving men dressed in white running between wee sticks stuck in the ground. Only one man can tell us what it all means and that is Dave.

So I expect we will have to listen to him tell us all about cricket on the next walk. 

 

Oops, I forgot. We have already had the next walk, so I guess we won't be able to have Dave give us the benefit of his Wisden.

Thanks to Jim and Jacque for organising the walk and for providing me with photos to take the mickey out of.