JUST KILLIN' TIME

April, so it must be time for a trip away for the Dinosaurs.

Sure enough, off we went to Morenish House, near Killin and Loch Tay.

The usual suspects arrived for lunch at Killin Golf Club, where it was suitably sunny and warm for us all. We even managed to sit outside for our lunch, which was very enjoyable.

Then it was on to the golf which was less than perfect, but still good fun in the sun.

Suffice to say that Hugh, the Professional, won and here he is looking well chuffed with his medal.



Here are Jimmy and Robin looking admiringly and somewhat jealously on.

 

After the golf, we met up with the others who had been sightseeing and shopping and off we went to Morenish House, our base for the weekend. Once we had unloaded the cars, found our rooms and discovered where the toilets were, it was time to relax and have a drink whilst some people cooked our dinner. There's nothing like a good Chinese, and this was nothing like a good Chinese. It was, in fact, a number of good curries.

 No Prosecco to whet our appetites, so we lost no time in just sitting at the table and waiting for the food to arrive.

We had a bit of time to kill so we ended up looking for all sorts of diversions to fill in the time. Here is Jimmy asking Charlie what a selfie is. Jacque says "Whatever it is you can't do it by yourself, I will be in it too."

Jimmy makes a bid for space to take his own selfie and gets photobombed by Charlie. See how hip and happening I am with these things.

As you can see from the photo below, Sharon's sister Sandra was there. She had been left behind on a previous family trip to the House and had crawled out of a cupboard when we all arrived. Luckily, most of us were quite happy with that and she stayed for the weekend. she even managed to conjure up her husband Chris and their aptly named dog Dino.

 And here Sandra and Sandra find lots in common with each other.

So do Jimmy and Jacque.

Hugh, who is supposed to be part of the curry team, realises his culinary skills will not be missed, so has a sneaky wee sit down.

Meanwhile the action in the kitchen is becoming a bit frantic.

"You put WHAT in it?"

Cooking doesn't get tougher than this!

 

Pam seems to have fainted under the stress and disappeared under the worktop.

However, they get the food out and the kitchen staff line up to take the applause. There might have been a ripple.

 

 

Then, before we knew it, it was Saturday morning and time for our first adventures. In a break with tradition, we split into two groups. One of the groups didn't even go walking! Yes this was truly a multi-activity break. Some of us decided to go fishing! On Loch Tay! For Salmon! In a wee boat!

Captain Chris, who disguised his propensity to sea-sickness very well, had agreed to take two  victims out in the morning and two other fools out in the afternoon.

First out were Dave and Robin, who were lucky enough to get up at the crack of dawn and get out onto the Baltic Loch Tay to try and catch our tea. They succeeded up to a point as will be explained later. Suffice to say Robin caught a fish - thought to have been a suicidal trout that threw itself onto the hook.

This is them returning to the shore at lunchtime.

I have had to enlarge the photo below to show Robin holding the unfortunate trout

 - otherwise you would not have been able to see it.

Here is Charlie and me getting ready to go out with Captain Chris in an effort to beat the magnificent morning catch.

We failed, but we did get a nice view of Morenish from the boat.

We also got to see the squalls of freezing rain roll up the loch towards us. That was fun.

We also got to see the local osprey which seemed to have more luck than us.

While some of us were doing our Man the Hunter kind of thing, the rest of us were doing what this group is about - walking.

Luckily someone had been on the walk before and had left signs for them to follow.

The first sign was fairly self-explanatory.

 

The second sign was a bit more cryptic, pointing the way for, or perhaps to, MORTALS. Not being gods or titans they followed the signs. 

 And so they passed under the bridge - could that be their first mistake?

 

Looks like it might have been.



But they pressed on. Safe in the knowledge that it was a circuit. Or so they thought.

This seemed to be a walk with lots of signs. It is always good to take care how you pass things at our age, but I think I would have noticed if I had passed a man on a horse, no matter how little care I had exercised.

A bridge photo.

Is this a bird slum?

More signs for mortals.

At this point the mortals were supposed to turn around.

This instruction caused confusion among the group. Turn left, turn right, turn on the spot, turn around and go back. What exactly did it mean "turn around"?

Eventually Susan loses the will to live and has a swig of her gin.

 

They decide to go back, but Pam is still not convinced and has a couple of turns on the spot just to be sure.

Time for another group photo, which as you know can be a little difficult to organise.

Again, Susan loses the will to live and, saying "Sod it", heads of to find the toilets.

Mmmm they look inviting.

Sandra decides that there is no way she is using these facilities and takes a chance on a squat at the side of the path.

This is despite another sign warning that a dump in the countryside might lead to a fine of up to £40,000. That gives a whole new dimension to spending a penny.

I have a suspicion that Jimmy might have been up to the same thing. You can't really tell from this photo..... 

...but how else do you explain the bag in Sandra's hand?

Dino takes to the water.

Whilst Jimmy indulges in another of his many pastimes, taking photos of birds' bottoms.

Another one for the album, eh Jimmy?

Pam has something slimy on her hand. She claims Dino licked her, but my guess is that he was worried they were lost and he was just checking out where the next meal might come from.

 

Finally a nice group photo for the end of the walk. As you know, these can be difficult to organise and get everyone looking at the camera. In this case, there are two someones not looking at the camera. One is Dino, and he is a dog and doesn't always understand simple instructions. The other is Dave and he is an ex-teacher and doesn't always understand..... well you know what I mean.

And so, home to Dino's Trattoria for our Italian feast.
Usually these little Italian restaurants are staffed by a kindly old Nonna and her adoring family. This was a bit more like the Addams family.

Here is Sandra bringing over the glasses for the pre-dinner Prosecco. Clearly the bar was being set pretty high for the weekend food offering. Of course, giving us Prosecco before we tasted anything could be seen as a FIFAesque manoeuvre.....

......especially when the self-appointed head chef Giuseppe was so intimidating - in a less than macho kind of way.

 

Nonetheless, the Prosecco seemed to go down pretty well and nobody was churlish enough to suggest that this was bribery designed to ensure a vote for the Italian feast. It went down so well that Sharon had to have two glasses, or perhaps she was trying to blot out another of Charlie's tales of how good it was to go rallying in Barbados while everyone else was at home in the cold and wet.

Meanwhile, because he had a glass of bubbles in his hand, Hugh assumed he had to make a speech and began to tell everyone how he had managed to win the golf. Sue found an article on the forthcoming election on her phone to be marginally more exciting. Pam just despaired that she would have to sit through more of this at Carly's wedding.

So, everyone enjoyed their Italian feast without the need to resort to offers we couldn't refuse. Honest.

After dinner, Charlie keeps Chris riveted with another tale of rallying in Barbados.

Oh Dear.

After a fine night's sleep it is Sunday morning and time for another walk - after all that was why we were there.

As you can see the enthusiasm to get started was overwhelming.

  

But soon we were at the café at Balgy Bridge ready for another adventure.

As you can tell it was bit chilly, but we would soon  warm up.

The view from Balgy Bridge.

The view in the other direction.

Off we set towards the snow-covered hills. We weren't climbing them, of course.

But we did meet a man who was sitting in his car painting them.

Pam was looking for Chris, but he had gone home to do some stuff before having to go to work (whatever that is) on Monday.

Soon we were off the road and climbing (well going upwards) through the trees.

Surely we're not going up there.

This is the sort of thing you read about in the P&J on a Monday morning. A group of inexperienced walkers caught out on the hills by a sudden change of weather. Walking in Scotland is dangerous. The weather can change in a moment and you should only be out there if you know what you are doing.

Of course, we were well equipped, we had umbrellas.

So, we pressed on. It was really only a bit of sleet in a biting wind.

 

It made the hills a bit moody and mysterious.

It did begin to clear from the west.

Before rolling in again.

It was a bit cold, and we had to resist the temptation to huddle together for a bit of warmth and human companionship. Snuggling closely for that touch of kindness. Wondering if we will make it through the day. Is this the time where we have to take a chance and perhaps the snuggling becomes something else, something more basic and urgent? Something we will find hard to admit to tomorrow in the light of the morning sun. Something remembered with a mixture of fondness, regret and longing in the dark lonely nights......oh sorry wrong blog.

Moving swiftly on to a group photo.

We soon made our way down through the trees to a more pleasant location and another opportunity for a group photo.

For Jimmy, perhaps a time to reflect on what might have been if the snuggling had actually come to pass.

Somewhat surprisingly, we came a cross a boardwalk which led us rather nicely to a spot for lunch.

 

Dino certainly liked it.

It had nice views.

Not that everyone appreciated them.

We were being viewed as well as viewing.

Dino waits patiently, but in vain, for Jimmy to drop some food.

Bob no-mates.

Robin no-mates.

 

Sandra no-mates.

Or are the effects of the curry finally making themselves felt. Dino does look a bit odd.

After lunch it is time to go back down the hill and head towards the little tearoom for more food. We passed a nice little waterfall on the way.

Me, looking quite composed and in charge.

The reality behind that statement.

Soon we were back at the tearoom for some nice cakes before we embarked on the second stage of the walk.

Jacque listens interestedly as Jimmy explains all the things he can do with his Swiss Army Knife. Pam wonders if it would slit her wrists.



The other group listen intently too.





Even the birds are charmed by his story and can't get  close enough to the source.

After we all finished our cakes it was on with the next walk. Up through the trees again.

Nice glimpses up Glen Lyon.

A group photo with some blue skies behind.

Heading back down the hill before the rain came and soaked us.

 

It was a bit of a lonely trudge in some really miserable sleet and rain.

We were really glad to get back to cars and then back to the house for Sunday dinner.

This was mainly prepared by Auntie Bessy.

There was a minor miracle in that Robin's trout, with the addition of crème fraiche, horseradish and chives managed to feed us all as a little starter.

As you all know miracles take a bit of time and here are the 5000 waiting for the fish miracle to actually take place.

Still waiting.



Still waiting.

 

And then it was all over.

Another fun time away.

Thanks to everyone for their company, wit, food and forbearance. I think we all had a great time and I look forward to the next trip away.